L Flips Out!
by happyface-emokid
Summary: Super short chaps! But lots of em! Updating weekly! Basically, Light pisses L off, and owns Light! I don't know about other chapters. L is Epic!
1. Chapter 1

1 L Flips Out.

Disclaimer: Disclaimed.

AN: It's not very good... oh yeah, and they are still chained, but haven't had the fight yet.

"All was normal today", Light thought, "nothing can go wrong." He was wrong...

Light POV

"Ryuuzaki, what on _earth_ are you doing?" I ask, not sure if I want an answer. The so-called famous detective is now bouncing gummy-bears off the computer monitor into his mouth. While pretty cool (Light never new gummy-bears could bounce that far), it was obnoxious and annoying.

"What do you _think_ I'm doing, Light-kun?"

"I think you're bouncing gummy-bears into your mouth, and while that is all good and peachy, it's very annoying." I reply, "So I would appreciate it if you stopped."

"Well, do you have a more productive thing for me to do? I mean, I would work, but there is nothing to work on. Today is a dead end, and tomorrow probably will be to, although I have high hopes for Thursday!" I have no idea _what_ is going through that genius (although I'm starting to have my doubts) brain of his.

"Well, you could get some exercise. I'm sure you need it, you're sickly and barely go outside,

and I know I've never seen you with your shirt off but im assuming that it's not pretty." I say strictly, wondering what L would look like.

"Light-kun is being quite mean today, don't you think? You've insulted my physical structure, even though you've never seen it, which I must say you're wrong. You've said I didn-"

"I know what I said, Ryuuzaki! And, I'm wrong? I highly doubt that... prove it to me."

"What?"

"I said, prove it to me."


	2. Chapter 2

1Ch. 2! 2! 2!

Nobody's POV

"Prove it to me."

'How should I do this?' L thought to himself, his thumb on his lips. Suddenly, he got an idea.

"Alright Light-kun, if you wish." L said, getting up. "Come with me."

L led Light to the middle of the room and told him to stand still.

"What are you gonna do?" Light asked.

"What you _asked_ me to, stupid!"

Then L swung his leg and tripped Light. He then proceeded to lift himself into a handstand, both hands on the ground. Then he spread his legs out in a straight line, still in the handstand. He then took one hand off the ground and put it on his back, now only on one hand.

The task force was in utter shock, staring at the man like he just grew another head. Light then noticed he _was_ in fact _wrong._ The eldest detective's shirt had slipped down, revealing a toned and muscular chest. Light was dumb-founded.

The detective then brought his hand back down, then brought his legs back together. He then flipped back into a, well, back-flip.

He lifted his hands, "Taa-daa!" He yelled, his shirt falling back down. (1)

The task force was slack-jawed, looking at the man.

"Wow." Matsuda said, "I never- just, wow."

"Light-kun, would you say that I am in good physical stature? Or, can anyone do that?" L said, an epic smirk plastered upon his face, "Well? Am I?"

"Wow. Can you do the flippy-thing again! Um, I mean, yeah. Good stature, um. How the _hell_ can you_ do_ that? All you do is sit around and eat _shit_ all day long!"

"Eh, sitting like that is good exercise," L said laughing, walking over to light and playfully punching him on the shoulder, "you should try it sometimes." (2)

Yeah , I know. Short. 1: Yeah, OOC. I know. 2: I just had to make L one-up Light! L is EPIC!


	3. Chapter 3

1Story: Bored detectives are the devil!

Oh, just another random day in the Kira HQ. The task force was bored, Light was trying to ignore the fact he was chained to the most infuriating, psychotic, panda-man on the planet, let alone universe. Hard to believe he was smarter than him.

And last but definitely not least, L was bored. He was the three best detectives in the world. He was, according to almost everybody he had ever come across, the smartest man in the world . He was in charge of the toughest case in history, every police and detective in the world at his fingertips. He was practically made of money. Bored shouldn't even be part of his vocabulary.

Yet, here he was. He had decided that for once, he didn't need to think, so, shocking the entire room, he had propped his feet up on the table. He had almost fallen asleep, when he suddenly felt overwhelmingly thirsty. (1)

He set course for the kitchen.

He slowly pulled his feet off the table, forgetting the plate of cake resting on his knee.

CRASH!

The plate, now smashed beyond repair, was now on the floor, cake covering all of L's t-shirt and the floor. The desk seemed to be begging for his head.

Bam. "Damn it" L said, banging his head on the table, ignoring Light and the task force's laughter.

Bam. "Damn it."

Bam. "Damn it."

Bam. "Damn it."

Bam. "Damn it." Suddenly, Light's laughter became to much for the detective.

He slowly pushed his body off the table, his hair falling into his eyes, and walked over to Light.

"Light-kun, stand up."

Light, still laughing at the detective, acted accordingly, standing up. Then L did the funniest thing anyone in the room had ever seen. He did the forbidden.

L pansted Light.

He got down on one knee, and pulled down Light's beige khakis, revealing his duck boxers.

He then stood up and saw Light's mortified face, turned and saw the TF's surprised but amused expressions, brought his thumb to his lips, and said:

"You just got L'ed."

Phew! I'm done! Yay L! You are just SO EPIC! R&R!

1: L was so bored, he almost fell ASLEEP!


	4. Chapter 4

1Story: Because.

Monday:

Light: Did you just poke me?

L: Yes.

Light: Why?

L: Because I am L.

Tuesday:

Light: Did you just kick me?

L: Yes .

Light: Why?

L: Because I am L.

Wednesday:

Light: Did you just throw a gummy worm at me?

L: Yes.

Light: Why?

L: Because I am L.

Thursday:

Light: Did you just poor coffee on my shoe?

L: Yes.

Light: Why?

L: Because I am L.

Friday:

Light: Did you just write 'I smile because I'm Kira' on my hand?

L: Yes.

Light: Why?

L: Because I am L.

Saturday:

Light: Did you just put a strawberry down my shirt?

L: Yes .

Light: Why? Oh, lemme guess, cause you're L? *Sarcasm*

L: Yes.

Sunday:

Light: Did you just call me a 'Man- Bitch'?

L:Yes.

Light: *Sighs* Tell me why, L

L: Because, Matsuda told me to.

Light: *Face-palm*


	5. Chapter 5

1Story: Mechanical Cupcakes.

AN: Ok, L is Kinda OOC in this story, and Ryuuk is in it. Oh, and Matsuda's on Ecstasy.

Nobody's POV

Soichiro Yagami was sitting in the Kira Task Force HQ, playing cards with Mogi and Aizawa.

Matsuda was sleeping on the floor, tossing and turning and mumbling about fairies or something.

L was, for once, taking a very much needed nap.

Light was trying to convince a sleeping L he wasn't Kira.

**45 Minutes Earlier**

"And that is why we should consider Matsuda as impeccably stupid." Aizawa had just finished a twenty minute speech on how it was wrong to come to work on E (Ecstacy) and how he should be downsized to coffee boy.

"Aizawa," L started, "I only half believe that Matsuda took this drug on his own volition. He was probably drugged. My base of proof, Me, Watari and a police force of 100 officers have searched this whole building and have found no trace of the drug. Therefore either he was drugged, or he did it in his own home. The latter being a bit unbelievable because I have cameras there and didn't see it. Unless he did it out of the home, on his way to work. Hmm."

"Um, L? Where did you get the officers? I mean, if it was the NPA, we would've heard about it." Light stated.

"I had them flown in from Afghanistan, they have very aggressive law enforcement there." Light sighed. Sometimes, he thought, this guy was made of money, yet he couldn't buy decent clothing...

"So, Mr. Yagami, tie Matsuda to the chair. Watari, please get me some coffee, Light-kun, please come with me, Mogi get me a few empty boxes, I'll tell you why later. That is all." L ordered.

While everybody was performing their tasks, Light followed L to the monitors.

L started pushing some buttons and the monitor turned to snow, then showed the face of a very pretty girl.

" Hey, Ryuuzaki, what's up? Haven't got a call from you in a while." She told him, then started to wine, "When are you coming to visit again? I miss you!" Light was a bit shocked, he never thought l was the kind of guy to have a _social life_.

"Who's the kid? And why is h- OHMIGOD! You didn't turn gay, did you? You didn't leave me for him! Why didn't you call!" Light's jaw dropped at this. _You didn't leave me for him._ Does that mean this girl is L's girlfriend? This couldn't be true, she was hotter than Misa!

"No," L chuckled, "I didn't leave you for him, he's just my suspect."

"I knew it! You always put work before everything, even your pride!" She said, laughter slurring her words.

"Yeah," He said, frowning. "Anyways, Light-kun, this is H, although you can call her Honey. And yes, it is an alias, so don't ask. Honey, I was wondering, since this is your field of work, how long do the side effects of Ecstacy go on for?"

"L, you do know drugs are bad fo- "

"It's not for me, it's for my co-worker. He was drugged, see?" He says, pointing to the ball of Matsuda that was rolling on the floor yelling 'I see mechanical cupcakes! They will eeeeeeeaaaat meeeeeeeeeeeeee!', and burst out laughing, falling of his chair in the process. _So that's what makes L laugh! In fact, it is pretty funny..._ Next thing you know, Light was on the floor laughing, too. He looked up to see honey was in midst of falling off of her chair, giggling like a schoolgirl.

Yay! I'm done! Matsuda rocks, almost as much as L! R&R! PLZ!


	6. Chapter 6

1Story: Oh, Dear God...

(Goes with ch. 3)

AN: This is one of my shortest stories in all, so it'll probably take a minute to read.

(This has nothing to do with Chapter 5, I have writer's block.)

Nobody's POV

Everybody at Kira TF HQ was bored, even L.

"Light," Matsuda started, giggling immensely, "you actually wear duck boxers?"

"SHUT UP! You can't prove nothing!" Light yelled back in response.

"That was a double negative, Light-Kun. So you are in fact stating we can, and even if you said we couldn't, we still can. If you can remember correctly, I pansted you in front of everybody in this room, and we all saw them." L stated in a monotonous voice, a bad vibe escaping, telling everybody 'You better entertain me if you know what's good for you. A bored L is a dangerous thing'.

"Right. Fine. Whatever."

** Ten minutes later **

Light had fallen asleep, his feet propped up against the desk, hands dangling of the sides, and his face facing the ceiling.

L got an idea.

"Mister Matsuda, please pass me a sharpie..."

"Um, sure?" Matsuda replied, although it sounded more like a question, and passed him the marker.

Let us just say L never knew he could be so artistic.

Light woke up a few minutes later, face stiff, to the sound of a cap closing, loud hoots of laughter, L falling off his chair, and Matsuda taking a picture.

Then he saw himself. He screamed.

Doooooonnnneee!


	7. Chapter 7

1Ch 2 of: Mechanical Cupcakes

AN: One of the best stories ever: 'L: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual

The Care and Keeping of Everyone's Favorite Detective' By: taxiphobia.

Nobody's POV

"Ok Honey, thank you for your troubles. And yes, I will call and visit soon."

"Bye L! I miss you already. Love you!" She said, blowing him a kiss.

"I love you too, see you soon." L said, turning to the Task Force. The looked at him with questionable expressions.

"Say L," Light started, chuckling, "was that your girlfriend?" The thought sent him over the edge, he fell off of his chair, then he burst out laughing. Aizawa and Mogi fallowed suit, while Soichiro chuckled softly. Matsuda was still high, so he just yelled about how Simon Cowell should open a bakery and sell cowbells, and how it be ironic (1), and how Randy Jackson should go to hell for some inaudible reason.

"Light-kun, don't you think it's a bit rude to pick on your boss? I mean you don't even like_ YOUR_ girlfriend, you're always telling me she's to clingy."

Light gaped at him. Aizawa and Mogi were hooting and rolling on the floor like maniacs, or, Matsuda. He was still high. "So she _is_ your girlfriend?" Light asked.

"Well, technically, yes. But, I don't see why you'd want to know this. Why would it benefit you, I wonder? Oh! Are you Kira!"

"_**NO!**_" Light boomed, "Why cant you get it through that thick skull of yours? I"M NOT KIRA!"

Light was hyperventilating. This man. He, he... Ugh! Light was going to _die _of annoyance if this guy didn't get his facts straight. _How on earth could I have killed all those people and not remember a single thing? He thinks I could've, somehow... _

"Anyways, I'm going to take a nap. Today was tiring_." _L whispered to himself, because, really, no one waslistening, anyways. They were either to busy being high (Matsuda), yelling at him, or laughing like idiots.

** Present **

"Hey, what happened? Why am I tied to this chair?" Matsuda wondered aloud, noticing the what was happening.

He decided not to ask.

_By the way, L never got his coffee..._

Done! You like? R&R!


	8. Chapter 8

1Story: Well?

AN: Kinda OOC, but you'll see why.

Nobody's POV

Light: Say L... Have you ever slept with a woman?

Light POV

"Say L... Have you ever slept with a woman?"

What. The. Hell. Why did I just _ask_ that? Of course I know what the answ-

"Well, I don't know how this information would benefit you," L said, interrupting my mini-rant, "but if you really want to know, no."

Ha! I knew it! It's Ryuuzaki for god's sake. What did I expect.

"I've slept with many." L said with a smirk, my jaw dropping, along with the rest of the Task Force's, twenty stories.

"_What?_" I ask.

"I said, 'I've slept with many'. Does Light-kun have hearing problems, or does he just not believe me?"

"Um, I don't believe you! Dude, look at you! I don't think anyone believes you!" I yell back, only to be answered by Watari.

"Sadly, it's true." He said, shaking his head. "I've been kept awake _way_ to many times by your girlfriends! By the way, what happened to Sheska!"

"Sheska? Who is Sheska?" Matsuda asked.

"Um," L said, completely ignoring him, "she kicked me out."

"What! What did you _do_?" Watari asked, yelling at the super- sleuth.

"I kinda-maybe-sorta _setherfridgeonfire." _L mumbled incoherently.

"What?" watari asked, "Don't mumble L, what did you do?"

"I set her fridge on fire, then while trying to put it out, kinda blew up her microwave and then she pushed me out the door, no big deal!"

"Yes it is! You're always like this with girls, damn it! You pick em' up like fly paper, sleep with them, then get kicked out! Sometimes I wonder if you _try_ to get them mad at you! Is it a game? Do play for their reactions? Huh?" Watari asked.

I tried to believe all this. L has probably had more girlfriends than me. God. Damn. It.

"No... Watari." L pushed out, not used to being yelled at, "I'm just not all that good with cooking, or painting, or swatting flies, or falling asleep without falling off the bed, or-"

"OK! I_ get it_." Watari said, emphasizing 'get it'. "Just, try harder, ok?"

"Yes, Watari."

"Say L, how the hell do _you _get girls, huh?" I ask.

"Yeah," Matsuda continues for me, "and can you teach me how?"

Nobody's POV

L and Light: *simultaneous face-palm*.

Finished!


	9. Chapter 9

1

Nobody's POV

L lay awake in bed next to Light, cursing the boy for making him follow him to bed. He was perfectly still. Light hadn't let him bring up the laptop, so he was just lying there. He couldn't sleep tonight, not like that was anything new or anything.

_Ugh_, L thought in disgust, _Kira could be killing any number of people and I'm not there to stop him! Why couldn't Yagami-kun have slept in the work room, or at least let me bring up my laptop?_ _Oh, wait! I know!_

L leaned over and opened the drawer in his bed-side table. _Ah_, he thought in pure satisfaction, _here we go. _He pulled out a picture of him and his sister. _You have no idea how much I miss you, right now. _He then pulled the picture out of the frame and retrieved the silver key from underneath.

_Perfect, _he thought, undoing the handcuffs. He was about to leave, but realized something: what if Light got up?

_Hmm... Oh! I'll tie him to the bed! _L cuffed Light to the bed post and left on his trek to retrieve his laptop.

** Eight Hours Later **

L looked over to his side. He saw Light was still in a deep sleep.

_What should I do about this_, he thought while looking at the digital clock. _Work starts soon._ Then he remembered something. Honey had sent him an e-mail a few days ago that would be perfect for this situation.

He opened his e-mail and looked for the specific file. Soon enough, he found it, and clicked the link. _This should wake Light- kun up._

L turned the volume all the way up, then put the speaker near Lights ear. Then he pressed play.

**Never gonna give you up,**

**Never gonna let you down,**

**Never gonna run around and desert you.**

**Never gonna make you cry,**

**Never gonna say goodbye,**

**Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. **

The music blasted through the speakers, and Light screamed and fell off the bed.

"Ryuuzaki!", Light boomed, getting off of the floor, "What the _fuck _was that?"

"I believe Light-kun has just been Rick Rolle'd."


	10. Chapter 10

1_Okay, so there was these lines in a story in a story I was reading, and just found them _so _damn funny that I _had _to make it it's own story. _

_Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note nor the __underlined__ lines..._

"MMPH!"

L took his fork and got some cake, then shoved it into Light's mouth.

"Kira-kun? Would you be so kind as to SHUT UP for _one _minute? "

Light did his best to swallow, enraged at the detective.

"Ryuzaki, for the sake of my sanity I will say this one more time." He walked up to L and put his hands on his shoulders. "I am not, repeat NOT" but was interrupted "Not" L said with a smirk.

It took all of Light's willpower, vigour, and physical control over his body not to roll his eyes, but it failed anyway and those eyes went a rollin'.

"That's hilarious Ryuzaki, I've only got one nerve left, and you're getting on it... hey you know what else is funny?" L was about to ask before a strong fist collided with his face and he went flying backwards.

"You know, that really hurt Light-kun". He sat up after falling to the ground after being caught off guard.

Light's eye twitched (Hmmm, odd) "Well it wasn't supposed to tickle smartass".

"Light-kun if you would be so kind as to grasp your ears firmly and remove your head from your ass, we have work to return to."

"One more comment Ryuzaki and someone's face is gonna be different for sure"

"Up by seven percent Kira-kun" L began to chuckle as he heard Light sigh. Even when L left the room Light's eye was still twitching (He should really get that checked out).

_End! Yay! Thumbs up to _AiKo-Chan15_! He/she is the wonderful... uh, owner? Writer? _

_Whatever, point is... it belongs to him/her._


End file.
